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went to school early in the morning to take my health booklet with the help of sihui.
THANKS SIHUI FOR HELPING ME TELL MR JHEE or not i'll be dead! (:
let mr jhee see my appointment thingy and off i go.
go back home and get my sleep! haha.
fatin and fursyam were like why you come out of the school?? going to be 7.25am already..
i told them that i won't be attending school today and they understood. haha.
went back home, message rusyaidi and ask him help me pass the message to munir..
and he replied where am i? and all that.. i replied him in the message..
i message sihui and buddy about my change of name.
but buddy never reply me. sobs!!
good enough that sihui got reply me. hehe.
went to get some sleep, called my father about the appointment thingy and the making of my IC.
haiz.. i was 1 hour late for my appointment. reach the hospital at 10.30am.
late because of my father.. haiz..
check already then go and make my IC.
went there and after the thing,
went to eat there and went off to my father's taxi..
and off we go home..
reached home, let my dog out and i play together with her..
then my elder brother forgotten to eat but luckily that i've brought the food home..
and he ate it.. and he went out to work..
finally, 1.30 already. meet buddy and then meet up with jiejie and jiejie's daddy.
they eat. then i just stay there look at them eating. haha!! xD
go to the block 151 and see jiejie's daddy cut hair..
go mac and see cassalyn they all..
after that, go and meet my mummy. (:
went to bedok interchange then mummy tell me that she's going to make me a new contact lenses. but that's for a whole year..
oh my god!!
one year lehs!!! don't know whether i can manage or not.
120 bucks lehs!! same price as my new mouthpiece.
the mouthpiece is sponsered by the school. hehe!!
got nothing to update already.. tomorrow got national anthem to play. (: |
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| GRACE ♥ 8:18 PM |
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| Saturday, January 27, 2007 |
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cry out already and i feel much better..
thanks for zhenhao being there for me...
he was talking to me when i'm crying..
that was the second time that i've cried so called in front of him..
the first time was in sec1... got problems then i cried... in front of him..
and yesterday was the second time... on the phone when i cried...
he enlighten me when i was crying..
i told him why i cry..
actually is not simply because him... but also some other things..
i really couldn't take it and i cry out when zhenhao called me using his phone..
at that point of time, i was having a conference together with jiejie and buddy..
he asked me to call him and tell him what happen...
i told him everything and he told me some things in order to cheer me up...
i called back to jiejie's phone again..
and she was crying... actually jiejie asked me why i cry...
i didn't really reply her..
SORRIE CASSANDRA JIEJIE!!
talk on the phone till quite late..
then i went to sleep and that's the end of my post.. |
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| GRACE ♥ 12:53 PM |
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why?? why?? why??
why am i born in this world??
this world is full of problem..
argh!!!
i couldn't stand it anymore...
why can't i just cry out like this??
like those normal girls who wanted to cry then they will cry??
why can't i be like them??
i want to cry out but i couldn't..
who can make me really cry out loud?? not because of when i say about sad things then i cry.
i just want to cry out like this..
why can't i do this??
i couldn't take it anymore..
i really want to jump down from my house..
if i jump, maybe parents and friends will be sad..
but i don't lthink they will..
because i'm just an extra in this world..
nobody cares about me...
al they have to do is just to put on one mask on their face and that's it.
who will really care?? none..
they are just can't be bothered about me..
then why am i here??
friends were like keeping their secrets from me..
ya, i know that i've a bloody ass mouth.. but it doesn't mean that i'll say out...
i know my limits..
argh!!! whatever..
i hate my life...
why can't i be aborted??
why my mother want to give birth to me and let me face all this shit??
i'm tired of everything..
i wish that i could vanish from this world..
i feel like crying..
WHY?? WHY?? WHY??
why can't i just cry out??
i want to cry.....
end of post.. and this is for yesterday's.. |
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| GRACE ♥ 12:38 PM |
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| Thursday, January 25, 2007 |
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another rainy day, didn't play the national anthem today.. because of the rain..
reached school, open the ava room and help the others to keep instruments as they were not there..
i 'sold' clarinets, scores and saxophones..
run here and there.. doing some warm-ups before the PE lesson..
so lame.. haha..
i had alot of fun during PE lessons..
played the 'improvise' softball eh??
cool man.. run here and there like small kids.. hehe..
after that, had lessons... as per normal..
no fun during the lessons..
after school, follow my buddyy they all..
crack some jokes here and there..
went to 3G classroom, listen to songs and chit chat..
teach guanshen about POA..
hope that he will understand what i teach..
went to TAF.. reported sick.. after the TAF, aslam n fadli came by..
that aslam kept saying that he's out.. and i tickle-d him..
he fell straight away onto the floor..
oh my god!! haha.. he made me do that to him..
went to meet up with guanshen, jinhui, jiaen and weekian..
we went to mac and sat down, chit chatted again..
crack jokes and buddy took some videos about jiaen..
seh's doing all those funny actions.. so he recorded it..
so funny can?? haha..
went up to jiaen's hse and take a look of the yearbook...
buddy want to search for somebody's name..
went down to the petal garden and slack..
slack till 6++ then went off..
tomorrow got to ask the teachers about the class tee design..
hope that munir and pamela got prepare their design..
got to let the others to choose..
haiz.. i couldn't go to school on monday... how how how??
got the bloody ass check-up.. somemore in the morning..
how to collect money?? how to ask for their size??
haiz... nevermind.. hope that that fhamy will help me..
aiyoh!! save me ar somebody!!!
BUDDY!!! how come everytime you got anything, you just refused to tell me??
not refuse to tell me but is that you just kept quiet about it..
i don't even know that why am i this buddy for..
i'm really very upset.. i don't know what i can do for you..
but to stand there and be like a wooden block who don't know anything??
i feel like breaking down but i couldn't.. i'm just to used to penknife to vent out all my sadness and frustration and i want to cry also couldn't..
i really hope that i can vanish from this world..
when i stay in this world, i only can feel sadness. not happiness..
all those happiness are fake.. i just hang them up onto my face.. nobody knows this..
i really really really hope to vent out all my sadness and frustration not through penknife but through something better then penknife..
can i really cry out?? i'm really wondering.. can it be done??
-dead from this world long ago........- only that you don't know..
left this world from 030107. i am not truely myself. fake being myself. |
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| GRACE ♥ 9:41 PM |
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| Tuesday, January 23, 2007 |
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i'm back to post.. hehe.. so long never post already.. felt so strange..
the weather in the night is very cold..
i'm shivering huh..
did my homework already. thanks to my BUDDY for reminding me to do the history homework or not i'll be in dead meat tomorrow.
there's nothing special or stupid happen the whole day.
so boring.. oops =x haha..
woke up very early in the morning, went to school for the national anthem.
replay the anthem for twice. because of that fucking new principal.
she said that she couldn't hear their singing but our playing.
so we had no choice but to play again.
i think that today's anthem was pretty loud.
ahmad said that not me.. haha..
after packing up, walked slowly back to class..
and found out that they were discussing about the new year fiesta things..
so i just join in to the discussion and Mr Jhee told the class about the class tee..
Aizat was against making the class tee but majority wins so too bad.. haha..
i was the in-charge for the class tee.. i told Mr Jhee about that the boys don't want to design the class tee so i couldn't send the design.. so, Pamela wants to help. of cause i'll agree to it.. we'll have brain-storming together to think of a design for the class tee... hehe..
in the first place, i thought that my BUDDY breakdown again.. so, i was talking to him about it. asked him to breakdown in front of me.. haha..
it's good to hear that he decided not to change back to his old self and he decided to stay happy..
i'm happy to hear that that at last, my buddy won't breakdown because of friends things anymore.. maybe he'll breakdown again?? we won't know.. hehe..
to BUDDY: carry on with your own life. don't care about him anymore.. he' not worth it. yea?
if you still want to breakdown, breakdown in front of me. dare or not?
if i breakdown, i breakdown in front of you. want? haha..
it's hard for me to breakdown again.. unless something sad really happens.. CHOY!!! something sad won't happen..
i'm a type of happy-go-lucky person.. so i won't sad easily, right? to those who are reading my blog now.. haha..
i think there's nobody reading my blog.. it's so dead.. might as well delete off this blog better..
let me think first and i'll see.. hehe..
i'm like a stupid ass person.. talking to myself in this blog..
i'm mad!! DEAD..
i'm a dead person anyway.. oh yea? i'm invisible.. nobody notices my presence.. i might as well vanish from this world..
OK, i got to end this post or not i'm going to be sad again.. haiz..
SMILE SMILE SMILE ((: |
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| GRACE ♥ 10:29 PM |
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another rainy day huh..
Agnes, Sihui, Jiaen and Jiaen's brother came to my house today..
they come my house to slack.. pro sia they all.
but nevermind.. i'm fine with it.. :))
slack till half, Jinhui asked mie to call him.
and conference together with his ganjie.
he cried when talking. and i don't even know the whole story..
hmmm.. his ganjie consoled him and mie too, of cause..
after consoling, he felt better huh??
i think he come that thing izzit??
mood swing.. wah!! when did he become a charbo??
hmmm.. bu nan bu nu.. RENYAO!! wahahahaha!!
hopes that he didn't see this.. hees..
in the night also got nothing to do..
kept talking on the phone.. chatting on MSN and watched a show..
and thats it..
such a boring night..
hais...nevermind..
tomorrow is a better day. :))
another 5 more days is my birthday.. :))
people, must prepare presents wor...
as if they will prepare..
hope that they will..
hmm.. nothing to post.
i'll post more next time. :)) |
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| GRACE ♥ 11:47 PM |
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wah.. finally back to post..
i think i like him. as a friend. i mean. :))
he is offically my laogong n buddy.. hees..
cool eh.. haas..
i've got nothing better to do..
nothing special going on these past few days..
hais..
but there's one day which i can offically be 15 and maybe i'm gonna get my IC.. hees..
those people who haven't got their ICs, jealous not??
hahas.. i'm crazy..
people, you have left 8 more days to prepare me a present.. hahas..
same date as jiejie's de 1 month anniversary.
hees. double happiness eh??
nothing special to post already.
i'll post next time whenever i can. :)) |
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| GRACE ♥ 8:03 PM |
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| Tuesday, January 02, 2007 |
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about today..
hmmm.. sihui, jiaen, guanshen and weekian..
then i called jinhui uing my house's phone..
he became our entertainer...
if we are tired, we talk to him..
is like taking turns to talk to him... haas..
after finishing copying, we went to tech view..
we sat there and chit chated..
suddenly, jinhui's sister called mie and told mie that jinhui fainted and he was being sent to the hospital..
she also asked mie not to message him because his phone is not with him..
i told them about this news, they were also shocked about it..
so they asked mie to message his sister to ask whether is he alright..
his sister was freaked out when she saw him falling towards the floor..
its like a spit second and something has happen..
after we went off, we went to block 117 to chit chat again..
we chit chat till it rained... haas..
all of us rushed home as it was 8++pm..
we were afraid that our parents would get angry.. so, all of us rush home... xD
at around 9++, jinhui called mie using the hospital's phone..
i was shocked.. he complained to mie that its painful to have a needle in his hands...
*OUCH*
he will be blessed from ABOVE... fu da ming da mahs... hees...
i intend to visit him in SGH..
i damn miss him lehs..
never talk to him can die of boredom.. hees..
too kisiao liaos..
ZHENHAO told mie that its worth waiting for him..
but yet, he asked mie to give up...
ZHENHAO asked mie not to be like him...
he ask mie to wait... HOW?!?!
what to do now??
wait or give up??
SOMEBODY!!!!
save mie!!! i really don't know what to do...
haiz.. jiao jiao wo yin gai zou she me..
end the post here lers.... haiz... *confused* @_@ |
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| GRACE ♥ 10:41 PM |
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LOH ZHEN HAO is kind of angry about somebody..
i can't say who the person is..
because i promise him that i wont say it out..
i'm his very good de jiemei..
whatever important things that he told mie,
i won't say it out..
ZHENHAO is a veri good guy..
he's cool... whatever he do, he will always think of the others first..
he always put others first and himself second..
such a good friend where to find??
this type of friend is extinct..
i know ZHENHAO since i was young but not long after, he change school..
so we lost contact till last year...
he then become my friend again.. hees...
he's cute can..
got anything, he'll sure find mie..
tell mie his things and he'll feel that it's not a burden or he doesn't have to hide it without anybody knowing...
another friend of mine...
he's also like ZHENHAO..
he'll also tell mie his stuffs and all that..
his character is also like ZHENHAO thats why they are BROTHERS..
this particular friend of mine is POH WEE KEONG
he's my gan-laogong but he doesn't treat mie as his gan-laopo..
but i'm not gonna blame him..
he's the another friend thats cute and cool... same like ZHENHAO..
the things that i'm gonna mention is the same as ZHENHAO..
so i don't wish to repeat it again.. hees..
this gerl is my gan jie..
she's the only gan jie that i have..
she's good... i love her the most..
because she's the one n only jie that i have..
whenever she has problems,
she will tell others in order to ask others to help her, give her advice..
she has done alot of things to coax her stead happy..
she's giving in to her stead in order to compromise with each other..
she's cool... all this things, gerls can't do it always..
but my jie did it...
she's so wei da..
thats the reason why i love her lots lots lots... hees..
 jiejie n mie.. i love her lots.. :))
 this person is my gan-laogong, WEEKEONG.. handsome right.. haas..
i don't have ZHENHAO's picture as he doesn't like taking pictures...
gonna end the post liaos.. :)) |
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| GRACE ♥ 11:22 PM |
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to somebody:
actually i dont' know why i'll have these feelings for you...
so you can't blame me..
i understand why you would say that to mie..
but i won't blame you..
all this things can't be forced..
you can't blame mie neither can i blame you..
i really hope that there's a chance for mie..
but i know that there won't be a chance for mie..
if there's, its also that you pity mie...
i don't want all this..
so i won't force you to do anything..
as long as we are friends jiu okyies le..
i won't daydream all those things that will not happen in the future..
i don't know whether i'm gonna wait or not..
but all this needs time to think all through..
then i can make up my mind..
dan lian really very xin ku..
because you know that you won't get anything in return..
unless that particular person also has feelings for you..
and that's when you can get something return..
hais.. really hope that there's something return for mie..
but i guess it won't happen le...
so now... i got to give up this hope and be normal friends with him and concentrate my studies..
i still wanna be promoted to sec 4.. hees..
gonna give up happily.. :))
you must take care lahs... keep having fever..
then you got take rest mahs??
school gonna reopen le.. really really must take care or not you'll miss lessons..
sorrie wors.. i'm the one who cause you kena scolding by your mother..
and your fever hasn't gone down is all because of mie..
your gastric is also the another matter.. it's also because of mie thats why you got your gastric in the middle of the night..
because of yesterdae... i let you sleep at 4.50am..
all because of mie.. sorrie wors...
forgive mie okyies??
i know that just now i sort of like lie-d to you..
because of my sister so i can't use the com when you ask mie to..
and you act childish in order to ask mie to say sorrie to you..
i'm sorrie, okyies??
hope that you will accept my apology..
this is the end of my post.. next time come back and blog again.. :))
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| GRACE ♥ 9:47 PM |
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